Random thoughts

Life without regets

Doesn’t everyone want life without regrets? No regrets in life, small or big, no regrets at all…

Let me ask you, does anyone of us have that life? Without regrets?

We know that would be ideal and happiest life but it’s difficult, really difficult. This got me into thinking about the regrets that I feel and how they evolve.

Some regrets last hours. Most of them are generally ‘Why didn’t I say this at that moment?’ Or ‘Why did I say this? Why couldn’t I keep quiet or say something more sensible?’ These regrets die down in a some hours or a couple of days.

The regrets that last for days are mostly related to wasted opportunities. It is rethinking about the activities that I did or did not do. ‘Why did I do or did not do something at that time?’ category. ‘I could have used that time well… made some connections… completed XYZ’ etc.

Thinking about regrets lasting months or years, I don’t have many. These are mostly related to the decisions I took or did not take. I understand everything is a decision, but what we regret for years are the decisions that make lasting impact… These are related to something that matters to us like our friends, family, life, career and relationships.

That got me thinking about Minimalism.

The regret of not buying something that I liked vs regret of buying something impulsively that is lying unused in my house.

The ‘not buying’ regret lasts for hours or maybe days sometimes, because many times there will be an opportunity to buy again, scold someone else for wrong decision 😉 or just do without it.

Whereas ‘buying’ regret is a constant reminder whenever I look at that piece I bought trying to find ways to use it somehow. We fail every time and it adds to the regret one more time. This becomes days-months-years regret depending on how long that thing lies unused.

Then just don’t look at it… okay! Let’s think about it later, not now please! That’s how things end up in attic or in those top or corner shelves piling up clutter.

Isn’t that the case with you as well?

I think ‘buying’ weighs more than ‘not buying’ in most cases.

When thinking about how many times I regretted the trip that I took or some activity that I did vs no. of times I regretted not doing something, missing that experience. Here I think the latter weighs more.

We are social animals looking for some dopamine rush, wanting to feel happy. We can get some easy dopamine by buying something (not easy on pocket though!) or by doing some activity – better with others (this needs some push!).

As the days or years pass by, those activities we did, time we spent with friends and family, those awkward & interesting conversations, those funny moments and life lived then… these give us a gift that stays forever – memories! There would be hardly any regrets!

Why not put those efforts now, Choosing time over things and make sure that we make most of it. What do you think?